Once upon a time, at the remote sub-Antarctic research station Macquarie island, there was a man named Duckie who had been a plumber for most of his life. Duckie loved plumbing. He loved the sound of water rushing through pipes, the satisfaction of fixing a stubborn leak, and the camaraderie with other plumbers as they shared tips and stories about the most bizarre clogs they had ever encountered. But one day, Duckie’s knees started to give out from all those years of crouching under sinks and crawling through basements. His mate Joe, convinced him that it was time to become and engineer. “Duckie, you’ve done your part. Let someone else deal with the messes now,” she said with a reassuring smile.
Reluctantly, Duckie agreed and hung up his tool belt. He tried to enjoy the desk life as an ESS – really, he did. He took up tending hydroponics, learned to bake bread, and even tried his hand at painting. But nothing quite filled the void left by plumbing.
One afternoon, while Duckie was out for a walk, he noticed a commotion outside his office. A plumbing Polaris was parked of Hasslebough house, and a couple of plumbers were unloading tools. Duckie’s heart skipped a beat. Unable to resist, Duckie sauntered over and introduced himself. “Hey there! Name’s Duckie. I used to be a plumber myself, you know.” The plumbers nodded politely, but they were busy setting up. Duckie watched them like a hawk, itching to jump in and help. He noticed the way they were connecting the new pipes and immediately saw that they were about to make a mistake – well, at least in his opinion. “Uh, you might want to use a different coupling there. The water pressure in this area is a bit tricky,” Duckie said, trying to sound casual.
One of the plumbers smiled and said, “Thanks for the tip, but we’ve got it covered.”
Duckie’s heart sank. He felt like an outsider in the very world he used to rule. As he watched them work, he felt a pang of jealousy. They were doing his job, the job he loved, and they didn’t even need his advice.
He found himself wandering out several times that day, peering around the corner of a building, pretending to water his non-existent plants just to get a glimpse of the action. He even brought out a set of plans and tape measure , positioning himself strategically for the best view, while claiming to be setting out the new temporary accommodation pods
Joe found him there later, glaring at the plumbers with a mixture of envy and nostalgia. “Duckie, what are you doing?” she asked, stifling a laugh. “I’m just…supervising,” Duckie grumbled.
Joe shook his head and pulled him back inside. But the moment she was out of sight, Duckie peeked through the curtains, still unable to tear his eyes away from the plumbers at work.
Later that evening, after the plumbers had packed up and left, Duckie couldn’t help but wander over to Hasselbough house. He ran into his friend Hank leaving the building, Duckie casually asked, “So, how did it go? Any problems?”
Hank, unaware of Duckie’s inner turmoil, replied, “Nope, everything’s working great now. Those plumbers were real pros.” Duckie forced a smile, but inside, he was dying to ask, “But were they better than me?”
As Duckie walked home, he realized he had become that guy—the retired professional now ESS who couldn’t quite let go of his glory days. But deep down, he knew he had plenty of plumbing memories to keep him company, even if he wasn’t the one holding the wrench anymore. From that day on, Duckie found new hobbies to fill his time, but he always kept an eye out for plumbers.
After all, old habits die hard. And who knows? Maybe one day, someone might just need a retired plumber’s advice.
Engineering Services Supervisor | Macquarie Island 2024/25
