The great Battle of Penguin Parade
At dawn on Macquarie Island, the gentoo penguins were enjoying a peaceful morning of sliding, squawking and stealing fish from one another when disaster struck.
From over the hill came a terrifying roar.
BRRRRRAAAAAAAM!
A fleet of enormous yellow JCBs had arrived.
“THE INVASION!” screamed Captain Waddle, the most decorated penguin in the colony.
The JCBs rolled forward, beeping aggressively.
But the gentoos had a plan.
They formed the legendary Penguin Parade Defence Line, flapped their wings, and charged.
The first JCB driver looked horrified as 200 angry penguins waddled towards him.
“Mate,” he shouted over the engine, “I’m just here to move some dirt!”
“NOT ON OUR PARADE!” Captain Waddle replied.
The penguins launched their secret weapon: squid missiles.
SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!
Within minutes, the JCBs were covered in slippery squid, confused drivers were retreating, and one particularly unlucky JCB had been captured by two penguins from their elite 'Ellie Seal Team 6'.
Then the final JCB tried to escape.
But Captain Waddle stood firmly in its path.
The driver stopped.
They stared at each other.
Then Captain Waddle produced a clipboard.
“Do you have a permit for this invasion?”
The driver sighed.
“No.”
“Thought not.”
And so the JCB invasion was defeated.
That evening, the penguins celebrated with the biggest Penguin Parade in Macquarie Island history.
Captain Waddle gave a speech:
“Today we proved that when penguins stand together, even the mightiest construction equipment can be defeated!”
A young penguin raised his flipper.
“What if they come back tomorrow?”
Captain Waddle smiled.
“Then we’ll need more squid.”
And somewhere in the distance, a JCB driver quietly cancelled his morning shift.
Historical note.
This is an ancient gentoo penguin myth.
So as to say, the events in this famous battle, "most likely” did not happen.
So, sleep easy all you JCB lovers out there.
THE END!!!
