Returning to your children
Children have not had to share the parent who has cared for them at home. The children have probably had Mum or Dad's attention and time whenever required. The returning parent should understand that the children may have grown very attached to a possessive about that parent. This is a natural reaction, and with patience you can slowly re-establish your closer relationship with your children. If however, a young child becomes extremely possessive, special attention by the returning parent will be required to lovingly reassure the child that he/she will not be disappearing again.
Remember that children grown and change very quickly, and especially so during a six- or twelve-month separation. Babies become toddlers, toddlers become children, children become teenagers, and teenagers become adults: the changes occur so quickly! Respect the changes and don't expect your child or children to be the same, think the same or be the same as when you went away.
Children may have a mixture of good and bad feelings relating to the return of a parent and both parents should be aware that underneath the smiles and excitement may lie hurt, anger, insecurity, resentment. Some children may seem distant and uninterested in a parent's return. Be patient, caring and understanding.
